Briefly: Support me on Patreon | Rest is necessary | Live dates & workshops Hello, Last week, I ran a retreat called Wild Rest down in the beautiful, remote Cornish countryside. It was - and I don’t say this lightly - glorious. My guests spent a few days unravelling our weariness, and thinking about what it means to rest.
I was raised a pastor's daughter at an American megachurch where the unspoken (okay, occasionally spoken) rule was, "I'll rest when I'm dead." I became Jewish later in life. The first big draw to Judaism, for me, was the practice of Shabbat. Lighting candles and turning off all those unnecessary noises and doings. We aren't too particular about the specifics, but we put our phones away. I remember our first night observing, my wife and our then-roommate were being so funny, and I couldn't document it or share it. I had this overwhelming sense of awe and gratitude that it was a moment that existed just for me. How rare that is these days!
Ever since then, I've been seeking corners for rest wherever I can find them - not just physically, but also from the straining of daily life. The constant need to resist, to fight for my basic rights, the demands from my peers to always do more and say more... I am tired in my own body most days, no matter how still I sit. So rest feels different lately. Finding moments for peace has become one of my basic, everyday priorities. And on long, exhausting weeks, there's always Shabbat :)
I love this post so much; thank you for writing it. Like you, I grew up believing that rest = indolence. When you say "What am I, if I’m not doing? What if I can never get started again?" that is it --- this drives my every fear surrounding rest. Thank you for giving words to it. xE
I think there's a problem with the ways we protray rest - it's always so passive. That's never restful for me, because I'm always fidgeting. When I realised that I rest in motion, I really began to make progress!
I love the idea of rest in motion- It is truly antithetical to what we in the west associate with rest (but not in the east, where motion can be meditational).
What perfect timing as the heat wave forced me to rest, left me no options other than to cycle through all of those stories of laziness, indulgence, non-productivity. Finally, I realized that rest is an act of self-care, not a personal failure. Thanks for this beautiful reminder.
How much do I love this post. Already sent it to a couple of friends and put (credited & tagged) excerpts into my Insta story. It coordinates well with my effort to be really brave, really counter-cultural to the academic setting in which I work, to de-emphasize finished-product grading of student work, rewarding the engagement with step-wise building of work, reducing the number of readings and numbers of pages. Because I know they need to rest. I need to rest. We are not made to go go go to the point of harvesting our future vitality and health so we can do more now. Would we deny sleep to our own pets or livestock animals? Are no less worthy?
And I mean "brave" ----because what I am doing now is so terribly at odds with the culture around me ,and I have to be secure in my own skin, sure of the rightness of this, with not a lot of support except from a few other like-minded colleagues scattered around the continent who get this, too.
Oh I know that culture only too well - we teach the next generation to be as wired and exhausted as we are. I so admire the way you're trying to break that cycle. It's SO needed.
This came as a sign, as I’m exactly on My bed a thursday afteenoon and I can’t move. A horrible migraine headache since this morning (never had one) is litterally keeping me in bed resting while I have thousands of things to do...but just can’t physically.
I was raised a pastor's daughter at an American megachurch where the unspoken (okay, occasionally spoken) rule was, "I'll rest when I'm dead." I became Jewish later in life. The first big draw to Judaism, for me, was the practice of Shabbat. Lighting candles and turning off all those unnecessary noises and doings. We aren't too particular about the specifics, but we put our phones away. I remember our first night observing, my wife and our then-roommate were being so funny, and I couldn't document it or share it. I had this overwhelming sense of awe and gratitude that it was a moment that existed just for me. How rare that is these days!
Ever since then, I've been seeking corners for rest wherever I can find them - not just physically, but also from the straining of daily life. The constant need to resist, to fight for my basic rights, the demands from my peers to always do more and say more... I am tired in my own body most days, no matter how still I sit. So rest feels different lately. Finding moments for peace has become one of my basic, everyday priorities. And on long, exhausting weeks, there's always Shabbat :)
I'm always so drawn to the idea of a Shabbat - what a beautiful pause in the week. I love your description here.
Sabbath observance -- so much yes -- thank you for sharing.
I love this post so much; thank you for writing it. Like you, I grew up believing that rest = indolence. When you say "What am I, if I’m not doing? What if I can never get started again?" that is it --- this drives my every fear surrounding rest. Thank you for giving words to it. xE
I think there's a problem with the ways we protray rest - it's always so passive. That's never restful for me, because I'm always fidgeting. When I realised that I rest in motion, I really began to make progress!
I love the idea of rest in motion- It is truly antithetical to what we in the west associate with rest (but not in the east, where motion can be meditational).
Rest in motion yes!!!
What perfect timing as the heat wave forced me to rest, left me no options other than to cycle through all of those stories of laziness, indulgence, non-productivity. Finally, I realized that rest is an act of self-care, not a personal failure. Thanks for this beautiful reminder.
You are absolutely right :)
How much do I love this post. Already sent it to a couple of friends and put (credited & tagged) excerpts into my Insta story. It coordinates well with my effort to be really brave, really counter-cultural to the academic setting in which I work, to de-emphasize finished-product grading of student work, rewarding the engagement with step-wise building of work, reducing the number of readings and numbers of pages. Because I know they need to rest. I need to rest. We are not made to go go go to the point of harvesting our future vitality and health so we can do more now. Would we deny sleep to our own pets or livestock animals? Are no less worthy?
And I mean "brave" ----because what I am doing now is so terribly at odds with the culture around me ,and I have to be secure in my own skin, sure of the rightness of this, with not a lot of support except from a few other like-minded colleagues scattered around the continent who get this, too.
Oh I know that culture only too well - we teach the next generation to be as wired and exhausted as we are. I so admire the way you're trying to break that cycle. It's SO needed.
This came as a sign, as I’m exactly on My bed a thursday afteenoon and I can’t move. A horrible migraine headache since this morning (never had one) is litterally keeping me in bed resting while I have thousands of things to do...but just can’t physically.
Take it easy! I know it's hard, but sometimes you just have to stop x
Thank you Katherine